Another note from Annie

We have not been able to post over the past couple of days. Braden is having more issues lately than we would like. Steve was able to post some of the major details and I am personally overloaded with information. I have been through all the emotions that my brain can think of and now I somehow feel numb. I know I must accept the fact that my son is in NICU facing really bad days. But my heart aches for my son like any mother's would. My arms ache to hold him and I ache to kiss his sweet face. My ears ache to hear him cry.

I try to stay strong for Braden, for my husband and for myself. But that is much harder than it sounds. Crying, not sleeping and not eating has become the norm in our lives. We cry so much that we actually get headaches and I could almost swear we have no tears left. I know that his doctors and nurses will take excellent care of Braden. Right now it feels as though the medical staff at Baylor are his parents 24/7 and we pray and pray for them as much as we can. I know that prayerful people like you will give his spirit the motivation to keep on fighting. And we pray for you, too!

Having a child in NICU can really humble a person and make you feel like nothing else really matters. My heart is at Baylor NICU like many other mothers who have babies there. There truly are no words that can describe what it feels like and how much it hurts. Before Braden was born, I was very spoiled and many would have labeled me as high maitenance. But suddenly, all of those perspectives have changed. I used to be the first one in line for the new Carlos Santana sandals or the new line of Nine West purses at Foley's. But now, I could honestly care less about any of those things. All my energy is on Braden and Steve. We pray that Braden will have no serious medical issues when he finally comes home. But even if he does, who cares? We want our son in whatever way God will give him to us.

That drive to Baylor will be burned in our brains forever. We will never be able to drive through downtown Dallas without remembering all of this. Going to Baylor is not a burden. It's almost like getting a treat at the end of the work day. Seeing Braden gives us strength to do what we need to do. And it also helps us to prepare for that joyful day when he gets to come home.

Right now I am working full days. But depending on Braden, sometimes I work half days. I have just enough time to get home, try to eat and shower, then jump in the car by 7:00 p.m. We can see Braden at 8:00 p.m. and we stay until 10:00 or so. Seeing the downtown streets every day is almost theraputic. And it is educational! I can tell you every detail of those streets. I should have a job giving tours of the downtown area! Want to know where to park your car for the JFK Museum or how to find the Farmer's Market? Just ask me! Clara can give you the exact times of every Dart Train or Bus that go downtown because she takes those every day. As we are adapting to our new routine, we keep seeing the same people on the street, on the bus, walking to their cars doing their daily routine. And it's getting easier.

Steve and I have been through a lot in our first year of marriage. We have had our ups and downs like most couples. Our 1 year anniversary is April 10 and I can honestly say that I love Steve more with each passing day. It's sometimes hard to imagine that I could love him even more, but the next day, I do! Steve's strength and loving emotions through all of this has been inspirational. I am so proud to see him be such a caring and devoted daddy. It does get hard because our stress levels are at an all-time high. But he and I love each other and our son and we're sticking together! Steve's family doesn't live here. His father and step-mother, Bob and Amy a.k.a. Grandbob and Gramy, live in Memphis, Tennessee. His mother lives in Sherman. The distance does make it tough but my family is here. And there's a ton of us and hopefully that makes him feel a little better.

Thanks for stopping by here to check on Braden and thank you for all your words of encouragement. Special thanks for all of your prayers!

3/31/2005

We wanted to give everyone the latest update on Braden's condition. Yesterday morning, his lungs had almost completely collapsed. They had to put him on a special ventilator which basically breathes completely for him. He was also given a medicine to help with the situation. This medicine appears to be causing his blood pressure to slip. X-rays done early yesterday morning vs. later in the day showed a mild improvement at best, no change at worst. This morning hasn't shown us any real improvement, but also no downgrade. The nurses are monitoring him around the clock and are confident his condition will improve. Most preemies face these same challenges, Braden had just got our hopes up so high when he was going along so smoothly. These situations are not uncommon and should be fully treatable with this ventilator and medication. He is having to stay sedated most of the time, due to when awake, his natural reaction is to try to breath on his own, which works against us with this new ventilator. We'll try to update ASAP hopefully with good news. For anyone looking for updates, please just check back to this BLOG. Right now everything is so stressful and difficult that it makes it almost impossible to take phone calls. Thanks for your concern and we'll keep you posted.
Steve & Annie

Bumpy Afternoon

We have more news about Braden's day. Of the 4 chambers of his heart, the upper left chamber is beating too fast. He has 2 small heart murmurs which are acting like 1 large murmur. The murmur is allowing too many fluids into his lungs.

His left lung is not fully inflating which means his right lung is doing most of the work. This could over-work his right lung. The doctors believe he has a chronic lung disease and that is causing the problems with his left lung. The doctors are treating him with medication for it.

Braden's kidneys are not mature enough yet to fully release sodium and potassium. He is getting liquid nutrients to supplement the loss.

Now for some good news...

His blood pressure is stable. It's a little low, but not critical. Braden is back on formula today! We can only pray that gaining some weight will help with the other problems he is having. Also, Braden will only be on that 1 antibiotic for 2 more days, which means that infection is clearing up faster than we thought. And the best news of the day comes from the results of his brain scan and thyroid scan. They are both negative!! That means both are perfectly healthy!

Annie took this photo of Braden today. Doesn't it look like he's praying?

Bumpy Morning

Braden is having a bumpy morning. His blood pressure has dipped rather low again and it's also starting to clot. His nurses are having trouble doing his gases because his blood clots before they can get done. His gases are a thorough assessment of his bodily functions, nutrient levels, etc. We are hoping that it is easily treatable. Annie is taking a half day at work and will be at Baylor this afternoon.

The good news is that Braden's infection is slowly starting to heal. He is down to 1 antibiotic and hopefully he will be placed on formula again today. Braden now weighs 2 pounds 5 ounces. He has actually gained weight since being off formula! What a great sign. Frankly, I think it might be a genetic thing...we all seem to gain weight no matter how hard we try to take it off! :)

Braden turned 1 month old yesterday and he received many wonderful gifts from so many people. Newborns in Need sent him a matching set of handmade hats, clothing and blankets. We've attached a photo to share those gifts with you. Thank you for thinking of him!

A Note from Annie

Today my son is 1 month old! This morning when Steve left for work, I just laid in bed and thought of February. As I started to think of all that happened in February up until his birth, I almost couldn't believe that I was blessed to be Braden's mom! Not only that, but I had a son with the one man that God made just for me. I was overwhelmed with just how blessed we are.

Braden has brought so much to me already that I cannot wait to see what he will bring into my life once he is home. This past month of ups and downs has made my heart so strong. No matter what happens, my unconditional love for him will grow and grow every day. Braden is my life and my heart. I love knowing that God chose Steve and me to receive this wonderful gift. We will have the honor and pleasure of raising him.

So on his 1 month birthday, as any mom would, I sang Happy Birthday to a picture that I have of him. Tonight at the hospital, when I can actually see him, I will sing again in person. I would like to send many thanks to you for all the wonderful thoughts and prayers you have given Braden. Please know that we are praying for you, also!

Braden has an aunt, uncle and cousin that are doing missionary work in Thailand right now. They have a very touching blog. If you have time, visit the Blakes at their blog.

This is Braden's incubator on Easter Sunday.


The nurse is preparing Braden for physical therapy.


After physical therapy, Braden was tired.


He's getting all bundled up and ready to snooze.


What an angel! This picture makes us feel even closer to God.


Braden's nurse, Leigh, says goodbye to us.

HAPPY 1 MONTH OLD BIRTHDAY BRADEN !!!!

Happy 1 Month Old

Birthday

to our son,

Braden Bunger

6:17am 3-28-05

HAPPY BIRTHDAY !!

Happy Easter

Braden had a good Easter Sunday. He got a really cute plush duck from his cousins, Jackson and Jonathan. It's rather large and lays flat on its tummy...just perfect for the top of Braden's incubator. We took some great pictures of it and we'll post them on Monday.

Braden really looks so much better. As Steve mentioned, he is not on formula right now and he has not lost weight. That's a great sign. Also, today the nurses were able to add a new IV for Braden to receive Lipid. They had a little trouble finding where to place the IV. His little veins can only handle so much! But luckily, they found a spot on his right arm and the line is working wonderfully so far.

Braden has started physical therapy. He gets a little workout once a day - every 3 days. His exercises are working those little thighs, calves, feet, arms and hands. On his 2 days off, he just chills out and gets ready for that third day of exercising!

Thanks for coming by to check on him! Many blessings to you and your loved ones on this wonderful Easter Sunday.

Latest Update Saturday 3-26-05

We just got back from the hospital. For those of you that didn't know, they did a lumbar puncture (spinal tap) on Braden to check if his infection had spread to his spine. This is a painful test, but we got the results today and no meningitis, no spinal infection. He also was cleared of any infection in his intestines, turns out he has something called a anal fissure. It is basically little tears in the anus which was causing his bleeding. I am sure this isn't fun, but fully treatable, and much better than the alternatives. To correct this, they are going to keep him off of his formula until Tuesday and they will give him a stool softener. We were worried he might lose weight being on his IV again, but he has actually kept his weight and gained a few grams last night. He is still about 2lbs 2.5 oz. He was resting well today, his oxygen level was just a bit high. His lungs seem to be having the most difficulty at the present. His X-rays have showed signs of one doing most of the work, while the other underinflating. They are just still very immature and will grow stronger in time with help from medication and breathing treatments. We are very confident that Braden is doing well, just with a few minor setbacks. He has the best doctors and nurses we could ask for. All in all we had a positive day, more good news than bad, so we'll take that.
Steve & Annie

A Busy Week

Braden has had a busy week. A roller coaster is the best way to describe what's been happening. The good news is that his infection is slowly starting to clear up. Also, he is still at 2 pounds 2 ounces. The best part is that even though his little body is fighting, he still looks great! If all goes well, he might be back on formula next week.

Yesterday, I was visiting him and a nurse asked me to wait around the corner because they needed to do a routine x-ray on his chest. When the other nurse came into the nursery with the x-ray machine, she had not seen me. She looked in at Braden and said, "Oh, wow! He is so cute!" I peeked around the corner and said, "Thank you!" She looked surprised to see me then asked if I was the mother. I said that I was his aunt. She said, "Well, he is certainly a cute little guy!" I proudly responded, "Yes, I know."

Braden will be 1 month old on Monday. Of course, we're already talking about a fun way to celebrate this big day! We are so proud of Braden for being such a fighter. We are very thankful to his loving medical staff at Baylor. We are especially thankful for prayerful people like you who keep Braden in your thoughts and prayers.

Roller Coaster

It definitely feels like we have been on a rollercoaster lately. Braden is doing great one day, then not so much so the next. Currently, the doctors believe Braden has a blood infection, which is being treated with antibiotics. Then today they tell us he had some blood in his stool last night. So now they are concerned he might have an infection in his intestines. I spoke with his doctor today and he informed us they were temporarily taking Braden off of his formula. They are doing so to give his intestines a rest and let them heal up. He will be on an IV during the next 24-48 hours. We did speak to his nurse tonight and she let us know Braden had 3 bowel movements today, and no blood. That is a good sign, hopefully the blood was just a fluke deal, maybe just a small tear. Braden is resting well and his blood gases are being slowed down to only 3 times a week. He used to get 2 a day. Just a few setbacks, but luckily we feel they are minor, infections can usually be kept in control and treated with medication. Although we feel like we have been on a rollercoaster of emotions, Braden's ride has been relatively mild, as far as these situations go. We are thankful for that and just hope things keep getting better.

Thanks again for everyone stopping by to check up on our son. We wish we could thank everyone personally and give you all a big hug. For now, typing our gratitude is about all we can do. We would sure like to hear from everyone who reads this blog, feel free to click on the comments link and let us know who's checking it out and where you are from. It would mean a lot to us and a lot to Braden one day. Will close for now, hope you all have a good Easter weekend and get to spend time with family. Steve & Annie

Looking Good

Braden now weighs 2 pounds 3 ounces! He's really starting to gain weight and he looks so much better these days. They have added Lipid to his formula and that is basically a fatty nutrient that helps him to gain weight. He gets fed through a tube in his mouth. He is responding very well to the formula. His bowel movements are much more regular and his stomach and intestines are obviously working properly.

Braden is still on antibiotics. They are hoping that his infection and the mild bacteria in his blood will be cleared up soon. He also has some small sores on his legs, back and tummy. That is likely caused by the infection. Again, we're waiting to see how Braden will react to the antibiotic. But I have a very good feeling that our little fighter is going to pull right through this!

When I got to the hospital last night, MoMo and PoPo were already in the nursery with Braden. They got to see the nurse change Braden's pamper. They are using a slightly larger pamper for him now. We were really excited about that! When Braden is getting a pamper change, he stretches his arms way up and his legs way out! It's very cute! I was so happy that MoMo and PoPo finally had a chance to see him do that.

While MoMo and PoPo were in the nursery, I was in the waiting room with Connie. We must have waited 30 minutes before PoPo finally came out! They sure do hog up their time in there...not that I blame them. When I finally got in there, Braden was having tummy time. We giggled because the nurse had brushed his hair and he looked as if he were ready to go to Sunday Mass! I did manage to video tape Braden last night. As soon as I can digitize and upload the video, I'll post it so you can see Braden...fancy hairdo and all!

Expressions

Last night, Annie and I went to the hospital. As Steve reported, Braden does have an infection that is being treated by antibiotics. They also detected a mild bacteria in his blood. Fortunately, the antibiotics that he is on will clear that up. Again, we wait to see how our little fighter will battle this one.

When we got to Braden's incubator last night, he was resting comfortably. I immediately noticed that the IV with that blue cast was removed from his left arm. I go so excited! As you know, I am overly-loud (which is definitely my worst quirk) and I praised Braden for doing such a great job. I was loud enough to wake him up and he was mad! He actually looked like he wanted to cry. His face scrunched up and I was just waiting to hear that loud wail come from him. But with all those tubes and cords, he cannot cry.

Seeing those expressions on his face did hurt. It's sad to see him want to cry; knowing that there is nothing we can do to comfort him. Since we can't touch him, we just press our hands against the glass and pray that somehow our thoughts will comfort him. But it was also somewhat of a blessing to see those expressions. He has basically been expressionless since birth, so in an odd way it was good to see that face.

Full term newborns who are minutes old can already make those facial expressions and let out those big, loud cries. It took Braden a few weeks to get to the stage of making facial expressions and I guess that's why we cherish them. And we are eager to hear him cry. I know that cherishing the sound of a baby crying seems unlikely, but in our case it will sound like the voice of an angel.

Thanks again to all who are praying for Braden. Just so you know, we are praying for you, too! We never forget those who love Braden and keep him in their thoughts and prayers.

The Good & Bad

I like to get bad news out of the way so I'll start with that. Braden's oxygen levels are still a little high, flucuating as high as 40%. The nurses think this is mainly due to the possible infection he may have and the stress he has been under the last few days. We are still waiting for test results on the lung infection, but are told it is a very common issue and fully treatable with medication. He also had some blisters develop which are also probable infections. That is being treated with anitbiotics and already clearing up. Now thats out of the way, the better stuff. Braden was up in his weight gain again last night, to 2lbs 3ozs, up another ounce. They are starting to add calories to his formula to help fatten him up. His blood gasses taken this morning were perfect and his blood pressure is still great. They have also removed all the IV's from his body, except one still in his foot, which is supplying nutrients. He doesn't have that blue cast looking thing on his arm in some of the pictures anymore. So all in all mostly good news. Now to just get the lung issue taken care of and we will be in good shape to fight the next battle. Annie says she takes credit for Braden's wonderful eating skills, he seems to have no problems at all in that regard. Thanks for stoping by - be sure and check out the new pictures added yesterday (thanks Clara) .
Steve & Annie

3 Weeks Old - 2 lbs 2 oz

Braden is 3 weeks old today. He has been such a blessing to all of us. He has truly swept us all off our feet. Braden is such a precious baby and we thank you all for loving him and praying for him. We were so happy that Braden hit 2 pounds that we had a 2 pound party. MoMo and Annie brought 2 pounds of shrimp each, Connie brought 2 pounds of veggies, etc. PoPo wanted 2 pounds of dessert, but had to settle for 2 pounds of chips. :o)

Braden did give us a big scare on Sunday, but I'm happy to report that he's doing much better now. He's much more stable and not as restless. We know that he will hit these bumps along the way, and we pray that he will continue to fight right over those bumps.

On Saturday, Steve finally got to hold his son for the first time! They snapped some wonderful pictures and we are so happy to share them with you!

Tummy time before Kangaroo Care with Daddy!


Steve and Braden are preparing for Kangaroo Care.


Steve made sure all the cords were adjusted.


Steve then made sure Braden was comfy.


Braden snuggled up to his daddy.


Guess who weighs 2 pounds??!!


All eyes on daddy after Kangaroo Care!


Look at these feet! They are 4 cm from toe to heel


Kangaroo Care with daddy made him sleepy!

Back to work

Just a quick note to let those who didn't know, Annie went back to work today. She has been out for the last 6 weeks so hopefully that will work out o.k. As far as Braden's condition, we spoke to the nurses this morning and they said he rested well all night long. His weight is 2lb 2oz - up 11oz from birth. Hopefully it was just the breathing tube being too small that was causing yesterday's issues. If that is it, he has a larger tube inserted now and we can live with that. We are still waiting to get more test results back, but all is good at the present - his oxygen level has been about 25-30% and his other numbers are good. He just keeps growing right in front of our eyes. Hopefully we will have more good news later in the day. Steve & Annie

Not so good

Well, after having some good days, Braden is not doing so well today. Turns out he had outgrown the small tubing in his throat and was not breathing well. They replaced it to a larger size, which had to be painful. He was in quite a bit of discomfort so they had to sedate him and actually strap him down since he was so restless. We are hoping the tubes help his breathing. He has required anywhere from 30-90% oxygen today. The doctor took x-rays and determined his left lung is slightly collapsed and he may have a possible infection. They have been giving him breathing treatments all day, so now all we do is wait...again. It's been a stressful day for us, but even more so for Braden. I just personally felt if we are going to write about the good, we should also write about the bad. We will call the nurses tonight and get a check up. When Annie left today after 3pm, he had finally began to rest. Hopefully it will work itself out and we will have better news tomorrow...So thats that. Steve & Annie

The Greatest Day

First off I want to report that I got to hold my son on Friday for TWO AND A HALF HOURS. I'll get to that soon. Concerning Braden's condition, starting on I believe Wednesday is when his blood pressure starting getting a little low. The nurses had to put him back on his medicine (Dopamine). They also discovered some fluid in his lungs through a series of x-rays. This is what had been impeeding his progress of getting stronger and breathing on his own. Instead of lowering his oxygen rate, they have had to raise it, as of late. The doctors decided on a series of breathing treatments, similar to someone with severe asthma. After the procedure on Wednesday, his heart rate skyrocketed to over 200 beats a minute and his blood pressure was even lower. This is a common reaction after receiving this type of treatment, but had us worried all the same. So at that point we just waited. The following day on Thursday, we hadn't seen much improvement. We got to visit personally with Braden's doctor. He now wanted to give Braden a steroid treatment over the next two days. This would help with the liquid in his lungs and hopefully help them to mature more quickly. When we went back to see him on Friday, the results were amazing!

Braden's blood pressure had been so consistently good, they were able to completely stop the Dopamine. They removed the, painful to look at, IV from his head. Although the nurses tell us it causes him no pain, and is the best place to put an IV for a preemie, it still hurts to look at. Braden's heart rate had come down to the 150's and best of all, his oxygen rate had went from him requiring 50%, down to about 10% as of this writing. We really need for his lungs to improve. That is critical right now for his long term health. He is doing so well in all facets. We spoke with his Nutritionist and she told us Braden was right where they wanted him to be in weight gain. He is actually not that far behind what his weight would be still in the womb. Most babies are struggling at 25-26 gestation weeks to just regain their birth weight. Braden is so close to the 2 lb mark, which would be up 9 ozs from birth. To put it all in perspective, as of this writing, Braden was requiring much less oxygen, blood pressure excellent (no medication), eating VERY well, and digesting his food good, as Annie can attest to. She had the luxury of changing a couple of those diapers. I really feel for her in the years to come, having to change ALL those diapers on her own.

Now for more good news, Braden was doing so well on Friday, I finally got to hold him after 2 weeks, 4 days, 6 hours, and 15 minutes of him being on the outside. Basically, it was the same deal as in Annie's post earlier. You hold him, bare skin to skin against your chest and he just goes into hibernation mode. All of his vital signs seem to even out or drop. He just lays there almost lifeless except for his little heart beating. For the first time I could actually hear his breaths. They sounded raspy and a little scratchy, but he did well. On days when preemies are held, they tend to just sleep soundly the rest of the day, which is what Braden did, as we found out when we called last night. Speaking of calls, I received one at 4:30 this morning (Saturday). It took a few rings to sink in, then the horror set in. I was scared to answer, I have never felt that much of an emotional rollercoaster in a matter of seconds - when I found out it was just my work calling me in - I went from terrified, to confused, to mad, then to elated. Sure I'll come in and work, that is the least of my worries. Turns out some of my co-workers were sick so I am filling in today. Seemed like a form of cruel and unusual punishment receiving a call at that time, but I am actually happy to get the chance to make up some work for the weeks that I had to miss earlier.

So it has been an up and down week, as we were told from the beginning, was going to happen. This definately won't be the last one. We would love to write about only the good news & progress, but unfortunately thats not always going to be the way it is. But, for now, Braden has responded to the steroid, all vitals are good, and we are happy. Annie will be visiting Braden in my place today so I'll be anxious to get a report soon. Thanks for taking the time to listen to me ramble & more pictures coming soon.

~Steve Bunger~

Happy St. Patrick's Day

Well it's St. Patrick's Day and Braden was totally prepared. He is getting better but it is a slow process. We need Braden's blood pressure to get back up to normal. We need his heart rate to get back down to normal. And we need his oxygen/vent levels to lower to a normal level. Right now we're waiting on a lot of doctors to give us some test results.

I'm sorry this isn't much of an update, but hopefully we'll have some more solid news on Friday.

Another Update

Low blood pressure is a common problem for preemies. It can be caused by an infection or possibly a problem with the heart. When Braden was born, there was a valve by his heart that did not seal properly. However, he was given medication for this and the valve is now fully sealed. So that valve is not the cause of this problem. Braden does have a very mild heart murmur. But it is so faint that the doctors do not believe that is the cause either. The doctors decided to run further tests on his heart. A heart specialist is scheduled to meet with Braden today. Braden was also tested for infections and the doctors found none.

With all of this comes more blood transfusions for Braden. Again, I will get on my tiny soap-box and ask you to donate blood if you can. There is a link on the right side of this page titled "Give Life" which will help you locate a donor center near you. Please, please become a blood donor if you are able to donate. It truly saves lives!

Braden will also have to receive breathing treatments over the next 2 days. Those little lungs cannot get overworked so they must do what they can to keep him strong. He has lost some weight - he's now 1 pound 13 ounces. But that fluctuation could be a result of his bowel movements.

We will keep you posted. Thanks for stopping by and thanks for all the prayers!

Bumpy Day

Braden is having a bumpy day today. His blood pressure dipped far too low and he had to be placed on medication to regulate it. They had to place another IV in him, but his arms and feet already have things connected to them. So they have placed an IV on his head. I'll admit that it's hard to see him with that in his head, but it is for the best. The doctors will performs a series of tests on Braden's heart to determine why his blood pressure has dipped. We are praying that his little heart is just fine and is not the main cause of this problem. Braden is our little fighter and we know that God will help him get through this bumpy day. We ask that you keep praying for our sweet boy.

We do have some good news. Braden's bowels and intestines are continuing to respond to the formula. As long as he can feed through the tube in his mouth and have bowel movements with no medication, he'll continue to gain weight. Braden slept really well last night and does not seem to be in any discomfort whatsoever.

Thanks for stopping by to check on him. I'll post updates asap.